Spagooter Sqwoosh!

Hello? Is it me you're looking for?

It's been a few weeks! Apologies! I didn't give any warning that I was leaving the country for a while. But now I am BACK and I am cooking again!

Before I show this recipe...let me just say...if you can avoid it...DO NOT go on vacation and say "SCREW PALEO LETS EAT PIZZA AND PASTA!" because your stomach will remind you IMMEDIATELY that you're an idiot. I spent at least 4 days of my trip too sick to go out. If I had only had the strength to say no to those sea food pizzas I would have been fine. But who can say no to pizza, pasta, and BREAD when you're in France?!?!?! Not I. No, not I.

Anywhoooo...
Let's get to the GOOD STUFF!

I bought my first Spaghetti Squash a few days ago and it was an INCREDIBLE success!!

It is the most magical food I've ever encountered. By the power of science it turns from squash to spaghetti before you astonished little eyes.

You can find ways to cook spaghetti squash all over the internet.
What I did was:
Preheat oven to 375
Cut squash in half (or have your strong roommate, Jacob do it because it's much harder than you would imagine)
Put inside-up on a baking tray
Cook for 1 hour and then CHECK IT and probably leave it for another 10-30 minutes.
It depends on the oven.
It took me 1:15 for mine to be totally done.
Don't freak out if the seeds and guts get brown, you scrape those out.
So scrape them out! And then go at that squash with a fork and you'll see it become noodles!!!

Ok so that's simple enough, but now is my SAOWCE RECIPE

Spaghetti Squash SAOWCE:

You need:
Coconut oil
2-3 cloves garlic
1 yellow onion
1 red pepper
1 yellow pepper
5-6 mushrooms
Bunch of basil
1 pound ground beef
Spices of your choosing

OK!
Grease your pan with coconut oil
Add 2-3 cloves of minced garlic (LARGE cloves, don't be a pussy)
Add 1/2 a chopped yellow onion (if it's a large onion. if it's smaller (less than 2.5 inches in diameter, add the whole thing)

Let those cook a bit while you chop your peppers.

Add 1/2 of a yellow pepper
Add 1/2 of a red pepper (again, if they're small peppers, add the whole thing. the ones I used were BIG)
Now throw in your spices!
I used a ton of Cumin. Oregano, salt, pepper, thyme, and some coriander.

I let this cook for a while while I chopped my mushrooms and basil...

Add mushrooms
Add ground beef!

Once I put the beef in, I added more salt, cumin and oregano...just for fun.
I let those all cook, stirring occasionally, until the beef was about 2 minutes from being done
Then I added the chopped fresh basil!

Cook the final 2 minutes.

NOW
I BROKE THE RULES
I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO MAKE MY OWN TOMATER SAOWCE SO I BOUGHT SOME.
Aaaahhhhh!
I bought some organic tomato sauce at Whole Foods...I can't remember the brand, and I've since thrown away the container...so I say you should either make your own, or find some that looks paleo-enough for you liking.

Ok so mix your sin-full saowce into what you've just created and cook until its as hawt as you like it.
Pour over your spagooter sqwoosh and TRY not to enjoy it I DARE YOU.


A note about the sauce recipe....
I'm eating it right this moment, but instead of over spaghetti squash I put it over a bed of spinach! It's wonderful!
I also like to make it (without the store bought tomato sauce) and mix it into my scrambled eggs in the morning and it's FABULOUS.
Try it!


Okay guys that's enough for now!
I'll have more for you later.

Be Well!!

What I'm Eating Right Now...

Nothing is better than having breakfast for dinner!
Except Dollar Margarita Night at Underdogs...but that's not until tomorrow. So for tonight....

Bacon Broccoli Kale Scramble

3 eggs
2-3 strips of bacon
Handful of kale
1/4 ish cup broccoli
Some yellow onion
2 cloves garlic
Butter

This is so simple I almost don't need to put instructions. But some of you may want to know!

I chopped and cooked the bacon separately. It always takes me about 10-15 minutes to make bacon. I cook it on medium-low heat FOREVER. It's easier to chop and prepare the other veggies while it's cooking.
When bacon bits are done, set aside on a plate.
Use the same pan that you used for your bacon so you can get some leftover bacon fat in there!
Chop/mince garlic, chop onions, combine in a pan with butter (or coconut oil) to start.
When the onions begin to get transparent, add the chopped broccoli and chopped kale.
Add spices of your choice (I used thyme, oregano, salt, and pepper).
Cook until bright green.
Push veggies to the side of the pan, grease the open half of the pan with butter (or coconut oil) and add eggs. I cook my eggs until they're 2/3rds of the way done and then mix the veggies in and cook it the rest of the way.

Put it on a plate
Sprinkle on the bacon bits
Eat it and love it

(that was a haiku)

A quick tip about Prices...
I recently switched (suggested by my boyfriend) to buying Bacon Bits and Pieces instead of Bacon Strips (from Trader Joes). They're cheaper and so far there's no difference that I can detect.
Also if you want the cheapest fruits and veggies (and especially if you live in the bay area) go to the little Mexican and Oriental supermarkets. Later I'll make a post with a list of the cheapest and best little markets in San Francisco for all your fruit and veggie needs.

Also! I'm getting closer to being ready to do a post about good fats and bad fats. I've been meaning to for a while but I haven't had enough time to do all the research I want lately.

Oh and I should mention that the dollar margaritas aren't paleo. And I'm not a fortune teller...but I predict that this isn't going to stop me.

Be well!

Chicken Strippers

I wasn’t going to post again today but I accidentally did something awesome…

Spicy Chicken Strippers With Guacamole on Romaine Hearts

(because "strips" isn't as funny and you know it)

For the Guac:

3 Avocados

¼ cup yellow onion (I did not measure this. I’m just guessing)

1 lime

Fresh Cilantro

Salt & Pepper

For the Chicken:

Garlic powder

Oregano

Cayenne

Salt

Pepper

Slice the chicken breast into 1 inch thick strips

SMOTHER in garlic powder

Sprinkle on the rest of the seasonings to your liking

Heat some coconut oil in a pan

Add chicken strips

Cook one side on medium until golden brown

Flip and repeat

While chicken is cooking…

Smash up avocados in a bowl

Finely chop onion, add to bowl (I used yellow but red would be good too)

Finely chop cilantro, add to bowl

Squeeze lime juice in

Add salt and pepper until you’re satisfied.

When chicken is done, spread the guac onto a romaine leaf and put a strip of chicken on top!

I was honestly expecting this to taste awful. I was just throwing stuff together I could find in my kitchen. This meal collectively cost about $3.00.

A bag of frozen chicken breasts at Trader Joes is $7.00 and usually has 6-8 breasts *giggle* in it.

The avocados were 40 cents each at the local oriental market

The onion was 65 cents at the same market

And then I threw some extra cents on it to account for spices and such and to make it a solid number.

Be well!

Snack Attack

In response to hearing "There's nothing to snack on if you're doing the Paleo Diet!"

First of all:
Hah. hahahaha. hahahaaaaaaha. ha.

Second, here is a list of my favorite (and cheapest) snacks:

1. Home made Trail Mix

I made this trail mix out of
Brazil Nuts
Walnuts
Almonds
Dried Cranberries
Dried Blueberries

Brazil nuts are a little pricey and can be replaced with something cheaper (like banana chips or pistachios). Avoid peanuts.
I buy one bag of each ingredient and mix it together and keep it in an air tight jar (If the jar doesn't fit everything FREEZE the left over nuts. They CAN go bad.)

2. Cuties! Cuties everywhere!!! (those are little mandarins/tangerines) you can get a bag of them at most markets for 3-4 dollars and they last about a week--if you eat 3 a day like me.

3. Celery with almond butter. I'm eating this right now! This snack is dirt cheap. Take a little Tupperware of almond butter and a few celery pieces to class with you, it will fill you up quick.

4. Apples with Almond butter.  Essentially the same as above, but with apples!

5. Why not dark chocolate? I usually have a square or two along with my Cuties or my trail mix. I get a lot of energy from it since I don't normally drink coffee. Great to satisfy your sweet tooth.

6. Beef Jerky or dry salami. Great to satisfy your meat tooth.

7. Snow peas/Snap peas. I throw a handful of these in a Ziploc and crunch on them throughout the day. They're very refreshing when its a warmer day.

8. Avocado. I will shamelessly eat half an avocado with nothing else on it. But if that grosses you out, bring some sliced turkey to go along with it.

9. Hard boiled eggs. Make them in the morning or the night before--make sure you refrigerate them though. They can get a little stinky but they always taste gooooood.

10. Fruit in yogurt

Handful of blueberries
One banana
1/4 Cup organic yogurt (not fat free! you WANT that fat!)

This has become more of a dessert for me lately. For one thing, it's a bit more expensive to keep a stock of ripe blueberries to snack on the daily. Also, it's pretty sweet now that my taste buds have adjusted to not eating fake sugars. (That's right! Your taste buds will change!)

Yogurt Alert
Some people recommend an entirely dairy-free paleo diet which I think is fantastic! I've read that minimal dairy that is fermented (like yogurt and kefir) is acceptable. The probiotics in them are also good for my stomach. However, if you're going for a stricter paleo regime, cut out the yogurt as well.

Those are my top 10 favorite snacks! I hope you enjoy!

And here's a picture of a baby in a taco costume:

Be well!

'Slaw Burgers

Burgers With Coleslaw!

My dad made these while I was home over break and I just! They were! I cant even! AH!

Ground Beef (or turkey)

Green Cabbage
Red Cabbage
Chopped Green onions
Italian Parsley
Grated Carrots (optional)
Homemade Mayo (THIS IS WHAT MAKES IT A SUPER SLAW INSTEAD OF A BORING OLD SLAW SLAW! RECIPE BELOW)
Lemon Juice
Salt 
Pepper 

Make yer burgers anyway ya like! We BBQ'd them (charcoal, indirect heat, as always)

Shred, grate, chop, your cabbages and carrots.
Chop up the green onions and parsley, toss those in!
Slap a big ole scoop of HOMEMADE MAYO on there!
Mix it all up and add salt and pepper as you go for taste.
Also squeeze a little bit o' lemon on there for a fresh zesty taste.

I didn't put any measurements because it really all depends on YOUR taste. Just don't overdue the green onions! It's also probably best to add the mayo slowly so you don't overdue that either. You don't want a slaw soup. (But maybe you do, and that's alright.)
  
MMMMmmmmayo
This is seriously the most delicious dinner I've had in a long while.
I cannot stress enough that it's the homemade mayo that makes the coleslaw different from what you are used to. If you haven't tried to make it yet, gogogo! The recipe is a few posts below. It's a bit tricky so don't give up after your first try!


Be well! 
 

What I'm Eating Right Now...

Turkey Avocado Lettuce Wraps!

Super easy lunch!

3 (or however many you want) Romaine Hearts
3 (or whatever) slices of turkey
1/2 an avocado
Red onion
Homemade mayo
Organic Mustard

Put a slice of turkey on each romaine leaf
Put some avocado on there
Put some red onion on there
Put some mustard and mayo on that!!!
Roll it up and eat it!!!

ITS GOOD. SEE?

Be well!

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

It's been a while! But it's also been spring vacation, so that's my excuse.

This whole week I've been back home staying with the fam and eating non-stop paleo, courtesy of my paleo dad who is an AMAZING chef. (Side note...he's been doing paleo for 3 months. The first two months he lost about 20 pounds-all in the beer belly-and has held it steady for a month and counting! Yay dad!!!)

Here's what my wonderful dad made us for dinner tonight!

Bacon Wrapped Chicken With Asparagus and Homemade Mayonnaise

Bacon Wrapped Chicken
Thaw out or buy raw boneless skinless chicken breasts
Wrap each piece in one strip of bacon (or two, depending on the size)
No seasoning required
"How can you get a better flavor than bacon??" -Dad
Tonight we had them on the BBQ - 1 Hour. Indirect Heat.

I cook them at home in my oven.
40m-60m at 425 degrees.
After 40 minutes I flip them over and cook for another 10 minutes or until the bacon is fully cooked.
(I should note that my oven is over 3,000 years old, so yours may cook faster. Just keep your eye on it.)

 Homemade Mayonnaise
1 large egg
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 tablespoon white wine vinegar
1/4 cup plus 1 cup olive oil (not extra-virgin! the flavor is too strong! and don't use vegetable oil or you might as well buy the crap straight from the store)
1/2 teaspoon dry mustard
1/2 teaspoon salt

In a food processor or blender add the egg, lemon, vinegar, and 1/4 cup of olive oil. Let these sit and come to room temperature. Very important.
With the blender or food processor running, slowly drizzle the last 1 cup of olive oil into mixture. Steady stream. Very slowly. You will be able to see the liquid start to form the emulsion.
Put it in the fridge in a container for a while for it to thicken a bit more.
I wouldn't eat it after about a week and a half.

Mayonnaise For Everything!
I know that you either love mayo or you hate it with a fiery passion...that's just the way the world works. I happen to love it.
You can make SO MUCH with this homemade mayo.

Chop up some green and purple cabbage with some green onions and make a slaw!
Mix it in with tuna or salmon with red onions and relish to make salad!
Make Egg salad!
Make your own ranch dressing!
Dip stuff in it!
It's really a very good thing to have on hand for packing lunches and snacks.

Awesome.
I'll try to get out of spring break mode and keep posting recipes for you guys.

Be well!